A bump in the road
I had a dream that I gave an old friend a real, raw piece of my mind. I was unyielding and brutually honest. I woke up feeling more alive and confused than I have in a while, but the whole day I walked around in a rut - completely useless and overwrought with internal mayhem and a sense that I could do no right today. The things that help me see straight are the little moments of joy I searched for in the the everyday and mundane like cleaning or making something to eat - really taking the time to fill every moment with something to do so I didn’t have to think about how I felt like a prisoner in my own emotions. It may just sound like a pity party, but for a person who can always find her way out of mental disquiet, I could not find a way out today.
I’ve come to question things these days that I thought, for such a long time, were cemented truths, when I should know by now that the only reassuring thought is that mental flexibility and the ability to change my perception about life will help keep me sane.
